Throwback Thursday – Longing for Lost Days

The past couple of days have been a bit of a blur, not because I was so busy doing exciting things but because I spent the last 48 hours sleeping…well most of it anyways.  I became very ill earlier this week forcing me away from the one thing that gets me out of the 4 walls that make up my home.  It was a very rough period, I honestly thought that I had reached the end of my time here…the fever, the shakes, the chills, the technicolour smile that I had when I was awake…it was not pretty.

The reality of the situation is that while being sick really does suck, being sick and alone is even worse.  I found myself lying in bed, sweating buckets and trying to hydrate as best as I could but I just wanted to sleep.  No amount of technology could make me feel better.  This was really the first time that I was ill and alone in my entire life.  Not saying I have never been sick, or alone before…but for all my life I have been with other people (parents, friends, room mates, wife, child).

The 48 hours of my life that I have lost is something that I am not happy about, I may not be the most extroverted person in the world but I feel like I lost a connection to the outside world in a big way during this time.

I am not saying that having someone around me would have sped up the process of me fighting this bug and expelling it from my system (which I did by doubling up on blankets and taking copious amounts of cold and flu medication) but the thought has now crossed my mind that this loss of time it not the greatest crime…it is the fact that what if the worst had happened and as I slept for 29 continuous hours…what if I had not awakened?

My own mortality is now really at the forefront of my thoughts.

What will happen in the years to come when I become unable to get around and do things for myself?

Who will be there to comfort me on my bad days?

Where will I be in 10, 20 or 30 years from now?

Sure I am “only” 42 but these thoughts crept into my head as I started to think about these 2 lost days and all the days that I have thrown away in the past.  Time is the one commodity that can not be saved.  It is the most precious of all the things that we have.  You only get one chance at the moment that you have, the need to use each minute as if it was your last became very apparent because my own reality is that I have wasted a lot of time in the past.

Okay so the dark and foreboding Krispy has revealed himself…on a lighter note, I have given some deep thought to what will become of this site and my former blogging platform at www.chrisjpowell.com and have come up with something profound.  Krispy’s Bytes will be focused almost entirely on the world of technology that I hold so dear.  The posts may not be daily as the site that bears my name will be a place for my introspection, rants and meanderings as well as a future showcase for some of the work that I am doing outside of what my primary job is.  There are two projects that I recently got kicked off:  My Linux for Luddites and a yet to be titled Role Playing Game.

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Stay tuned, as the launch for the new site is tentatively slated for Monday, October 6 and I can’t wait to be sharing my time between two types of updates.

Cheers,

Krispy

 

Posted on October 2, 2014 in Personal Notes, Throwback Thursday

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