I love being a Dad, it is one of the greatest accomplishments that I have ever done. I can honestly say that I am proud to be the father of a beautiful, intelligent and mature teenager but the nightmare that is being a father of a Teenage Girl is about to begin for me.
I knew the day would come that infatuations and crushes would turn to dating, proms and well the things that teenage girls do with teenage boys…I shutter at the thought as I think back to the awkward years of 1986 to 1990 for me…but then I realize that I was the boy, I know the tricks…and I am fully aware of the hormones that rage through their not quite fully grown bodies so I thought that this would be the perfect opportunity to lay out the ground rules for potential suitors that may come calling!
This is really just a guide line for the potential that any young man will have to go through when it comes to getting to know my daughter and getting to know me. While I like to think that I am an open minded and respectful man…I am a father first. My daughter is my Princess, she is the reason that I wake up in the morning and go to bed at night. I work hard EVERY day so that she has what she wants and needs and I realize that at this time in her life one of the things she needs is…well Love.
She sat me down last night and said:
Daddy, you will always be my first love. No boy will ever replace you.
This was a sweet thought, but I know that truth and I realize that the tighter I hold on to the little girl that once upon a time fit nicely in one arm is growing up. I don’t have to like it but I do have to accept it…so for the time being…boys…beware, be warned and be safe because I am not quite as progressive and open minded as I would like to think. This is Hard for me. So, to aid in the process of being able to in any way engage in a “more than friends” way with my daughter…I have a single request…fill out the form below or forget about going on a date with her!
[contact-form subject=’Application to Date My Daughter’][contact-field label=’Name’ type=’name’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Email’ type=’email’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Home Address’ type=’text’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Parents Names’ type=’text’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Parents Phone Numbers’ type=’text’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Do You Own a Van’ type=’radio’ required=’1′ options=’Yes,No’/][contact-field label=’In 50 words or less%26#x002c; what does DON%26#039;T TOUCH MY DAUGTHER mean to you?’ type=’textarea’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’In 50 words or less%26#x002c; what does ABSTINENCE mean to you?’ type=’textarea’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’What do you want to be when you grow up?’ type=’text’ required=’1’/][/contact-form]
All joking aside, I am proud of the relationship that I have with my daughter. I know that she will make intelligent, informed decisions but to all the Boys out there…be warned…when it comes to my daughter, the first three rules are most important:
I am EVERYWHERE!
I don’t LIKE you!
You hurt her, I will HURT YOU!!!
If you remember those three things…then we will get along just fine. Failure to comply with Rule number 3…well lets just say, don’t do it. There are a few old tricks that I would not be averse to testing out on you like the Tucker Telephone, Chinese Tiger Bench and the Picana are things that I would be more than willing to use to correct your behaviour.